In college, I read a book suggesting nomadic people were not the wanderers we made them out to be. Sure, they moved around a territory according to the seasons but always around the same territory. Whereas the farmer, by his very nature, has children who grow up to want more farmland who in turn have children who want more farmland. This spreads out across the globe as long as the farmer has children and there is more land. The proverbial farmer is more the wanderer it seems with each generation in search of a new home. Did we get the wanderers versus the settlers backwards the book asked?

Marijuana, we are told, is an intoxicant. There have been repeated warnings over many years about her supposed dangerous side effects. Governments go to great lengths to lump it in with alcohol and tobacco in order to suggest weed has all the same inherent dangers or worse. I want to proselytize cannabis as an un-intoxicant. I want to suggest that most of her side effects are positive. I think we got it backwards calling cannabis an intoxicant.

Read also: Baking a Fool of Myself: Cannabis Smells Great. Quit Pretending it Doesn’t.

Cannabis brings you back to reality after you’ve lost your way with other things. I’ve compiled a list of some of the most successful ways the great ganja has helped me find joy and comfort in life.

  1. Alternative to excessive drinking
  2. Sleep aid
  3. Pain aid (topically as well)
  4. Inspiration for the mundane
  5. Catalyst for movement
  6. Laughter
  7. Superfood

None of these seven things has anything to do with leaving reality. They are all ways to get back there. Cannabis is the road to un-intoxication. It’s not even poisonous in large doses. I should know. I’ve tried.

There was a time when I enjoyed drinking a lot. I was doing stand-up comedy and hanging out in bars every night. Drinking wasn’t just cool, it was heavily socially enforced back in the day. I’m such an extrovert I got quite good at it. Then I got quite bad at it. Now, more often than not I substitute marijuana in place of alcohol to have fun, fit in, or relax. My life has become infinitely more manageable and equally as fun. The sweet leaf helped me sober up.

I smoked tobacco on and off for almost 20 years. I struggled to quit. I only broke free from the addiction with the help of joints. I like the act of smoking, just not cigarettes anymore thanks to Mary Jane.

This fabulous herb inspires me to exercise. For years I have smoked a joint before commencing a run or spinning in my hula hoops. It helps me turn all that brain noise down to get into the zone. Now I can smoke a joint and feel a desperate need to work out where I wasn’t planning to before. It triggers the positive behavior. Those neurons have fired together so long they are wired together.

Read also: Working Out with Weed: Best Strains for Exercise

Scientists are now saying sleep is super important to our overall health. Lack of sleep produces neurotoxins that can build up in the brain, and it also causes weight gain, weakens the immune system, and raises blood pressure. Sleep is as important to the brain as food is to the body. Whenever I have trouble sleeping, I drop some THC tincture under my tongue. Hello deep sleep, good-bye neurotoxins.

Everyone dreads housekeeping equally, except after a joint is smoked. Then chores become a fun game I want to win. So what if the all the furniture gets rearranged in the process. “Honey, that’s not the spice cupboard anymore!” has been uttered more than once in my household.

This green leafy vegetable is rich in omega fatty acids, amino acids, and minerals. Her seeds are exploding with essential oils and complete proteins. One might say she’s a superfood. Imagine cheerleaders with pompoms. “Yay, Superfood!”

My favorite pastime is to get baked then start baking. I cook by feel the way someone might play music by ear. If I can see it in my minds eye, I can make it in my kitchen. I just have to remember where my spice cupboard is.
Cannabis is the best spice in the world. Thanks cannabis.



Recipe: Shepherd Pot Pie

PREP TIME: 30 minutes
SERVINGS: 4

There appears to be something very primal about Shepherd Pot Pie because every time I make it, I get the most positive response from the men at my table. Meat and potatoes meets pie is a very sophisticated caveman dish. Expect many agreeable grunts and no leftovers.


INGREDIENTS

  • 1 lb. ground lamb
  • 4 g cannabis shake flour
  • 1 Tbsp. oil
  • 1 medium onion
  • 2 cloves of garlic
  • 5 medium potatoes
  • 3 Tbsp. butter
  • 1/3 cup of cream
  • 2 large carrots
  • 1 cups of peas (fresh or frozen)
  • 1 tsp. of grey salt
  • 1 tsp. of dried thyme
  • 1 Tbsp. of paprika
  • 2 Tbsp. hemp hearts (optional)

INSTRUCTIONS

  1. Start a large pot of salted water to boil while you peel the potatoes and carrots.
  2. Slice carrots into quarter-sized pieces and set aside for later.
  3. Chop potatoes into thumb-sized cubes and place in the boiling water. Cook until soft, then drain off the water. Mash your potatoes with butter, cream, and salt and set aside.
  4. Peel the onion and garlic then chop.
  5. Start heating oil in a large saucepan over medium heat. When it starts to sizzle toss in the onion, garlic, ground lamb, thyme, and shake flour. Cook just long enough to turn all pink meat brown. Take time to mix your shake flour evenly throughout this mixture as you cook.
  6. Preheat oven to 350°F.
  7. In a glass pie plate start your bottom layer with the medicated meat, then carefully assemble all your carrots in a nice pattern over that and toss the peas on top of the carrots. Finally, spread your mashed potatoes evenly over the whole pie and sprinkle generously with paprika.
  8. Bake Shepherd Pot Pie for 30 minutes in the oven to cook the peas and carrot as well as brown the top. Toss with hemp hearts after its baked.

Bon appetite,
Watermelon